I stood there puzzled. Surrounding me was every shade of every colour imaginable in powders, liquids and pencils. I didn’t know what they were for. All I could hear were girls giggling and speaking about what I thought was absolute nonsense. I just stood there awkwardly, meaningless to everyone around me. It was around three years ago that I was friends with a group of girls, I had just gone up to the academy so I didn’t know anyone but them.
They were always good friends but I never felt as though I fit in with them. The girls would constantly be gossiping about the latest scandal but all I would want to talk about was the football match from the night before. I couldn’t even enjoy going out into town with them. The girls would drag me in to every make up shop in the area and talk about their make-up as though I understood but I didn’t because I have never wanted to wear make-up and that has always confused the girls.
In each shop I would just slouch against the wall, feeling bored out of my mind. At the end of the day they would have spent over Ј50 each just on make-up while I had only spent Ј2 on a drink. I would never ask to go into any of my favourite shops because I wouldn’t want to waste their time or have them judge me for the things I wanted to buy. I had just accepted the fact that I would never fit in with any group of people because I had such different interests. I never believed I could be understood or taken seriously which always made me feel down and low spirited. Looking back now I realise that I was wrong to think that I would never find anyone like me and that I couldn’t fit in.When describing a girl one of the things most people would say how girls love pink, glitter and most importantly they always wear make-up. Even now in 2018 girls are being judged for not wearing make-up. It can even be in the dress code of some companies that all females must wear make-up on the job and some even include what shade it has to be. This can make many girls feel like me if they don’t wear make-up or if they don’t have a certain type and that they are being told how they are supposed to look. The average age my friends started wearing make-up was between the ages of thirteen and fourteen. I think, like many young people, my friends may have felt pressured into wearing make-up especially once all their friends start wearing it and they feel like if they don’t wear it then they will feel like they stick out for all the wrong reasons. I feel like this is very wrong because if everyone tried to copy other people life would be boring and predictable. Being unique is one of the best traits a person can have. If nobody tried anything new, their life would end up being a continuous loop, every week doing the same thing and I don’t think I could handle that lifestyle. I know that being unique, confident and grabbing every opportunity will help me go to places in my life I couldn’t even dream of and will help me find the perfect friends that will allow me to be who I am and accept me.In my new class at academy there were a group of boys and during registration they would always talk about football and all the things that I could relate to. Every morning I would just sit and listen to them before thinking about what I would say if I was included in the conversation. I never thought I would be involved because there weren’t any girls in my school who were just friends with boys, there were only boy groups and girl groups. One morning though I decided I would go and talk to them. This was a big deal for me because I used to be quite a shy person, never confident enough to speak up about how I felt and I thought they would just ignore me and think I was strange. I slowly wandered across to them repeating what I was going to say over and over in my head. Surprisingly after I finally spoke up, they agreed with my point and carried on the conversation with me. I couldn’t believe how easy it was to talk to them. Reflecting back now I wish I had spoken to them earlier and I wish I hadn’t been so anxious about it. As time went on I began talking to them between classes as well as every morning but it wasn’t until they asked me to come for lunch outside of school I knew that I had truly been accepted by them for who I was. Not being accepted is a hard thing for anyone to experience especially when it’s a friend who is not inviting. Acceptance truly showed me who my true friends are because a friend embraced me for who I was and I knew if they didn’t listen to me, validate my feelings and treated me as I treated them, I couldn’t really call then a friend. But then I realised the only way I would be accepted by society is if I first accepted myself. I had to be confident and proud of who I was as a person and to not be so hard on myself. For some, self-acceptance is a difficult thing to have especially if we feel we don’t deserve it but just by appreciating my strengths rather than my weaknesses I realised how much it helped me accept myself and my life. This has allowed me to be the person I want to be as well as helping me find my true path in life.